It's been a very long week here. My girl is under the weather. Smiles are hiding. She is very congested, solemn, pale and tired. She does not want to cough, in fact she tries not to cough. She gazes at me with her big blues as if to say "What's going on mamma? Why do I feel so bad?" I tell her she has a cold, but then I realize she she thinks I am telling her she IS cold, so now I just use the word 'cough'.
I try to reassure her with hugs and kisses and hope she understands that she will feel better soon. And so we are plugging along, hoping this will play itself out without another jaunt to the doctor, hoping the prednisone will keep her floppy airway open enough. Enough to keep us out of the ER.
So the house is messy, I seriously need to go food shopping and the laundry is demanding attention. And I just don't care, which is saying something. I am generally OCD when it comes to tidiness and organization. I like everything in it's place and can't think straight unless this is so. But today, I am soley focused on Sarah and where she's at: getting all her meds into her, getting enough fluids into her, bathing her, feeding her and getting her up into her stander to help those lungs clear.
And trying to get a few smiles. This morning, she finally shared one with me and tears came to my eyes. I miss her so, when she is sick.
